Eighteen years are missing. The day my little princess will celebrate her 20th birthday, I will take out my old backpack, and I will leave for a long holiday. I do not know yet where I will travel. Maybe back to Patagonia, 30 years later. Or coast to coast, from Bombay to Calcutta. I am not sure yet, and I have some 18 years in front of me to draw my travel plan — if I would ever need one. I might just take a train, then another one, and follow the flow of my thoughts, till I reach the ocean. Whatever ocean.
Today, my girl is two-year old. Time ran so fast. It feels like yesterday that we went to the hospital, a cold morning of a rainy Scandinavian autumn. I remember her first cry, her dark big eyes, those little hands grabbing my fingers. We spent the first three hours in a warm hug, waiting for mamma. I sang for her. I still do it.
Others have children
It has not been an easy ride: others have children, we have a Jedi knight. Strong is the Force in her. One hour after her birth, a nurse came to check how we were doing. My girl all naked in my arms, and the blanket on the floor. “You need to cover the child” — the nurse told me. “You see, I am trying, but she keeps taking the blanket away: I think that my daughter does not want a blanket!” The woman looked at me in disbelief, and answered sharply: “That’s impossible, she is just born, keep the child wrapped up!” Two years later, I can tell you: my girl is still sleeping without any blanket. We spent 730 nights trying to cover her up. One minute later, it does not matter how deep is her sleep, she kicks the cover away.
I love this little girl more than my own life. She knows it. Every time her blue eyes look straight into mine, I stop breathing, the world is still, my ears are rumbling: I feel her power, she reads into my mind, control my thoughts, decide my actions.
Under general anesthesia
I decided it: she will have the exclusive right of harvesting my energies and my life for the first 20 years. Then I will take a holiday. God got tired just after 6 days: I do not have that privilege. I could get a decent sleep only twice, in the last two years. In both cases, I was under general anesthesia.
Since she was born, my little girl climbs every night between us, then over us, then pushes our blanket away, takes my pillow (whatever pillow I sleep on, she wants that pillow for the night!) and finally sleeps happily. We don’t sleep, but we are happy to look at her.
I will need a holiday
But guys, yes, I will need a holiday, I will need to sleep, to read a book, to take some photos with my camera. I will need some time to look at the clouds, and some time not to be worrying about what is going to happen next. So, I have to start planning. Maybe, I will also start packing. You never know, if the next 18 years will go as fast as these first 2, there is not much time left for preparing my bag!